Upon opening Matty's backpack and reading a note from the school nurse which begins, "There has been a case of head lice in your child's class..." I emit a blood-curdling scream of despair.
Matty: Don't worry Mom. They checked my head today. I don't have it.
Me: Well, that's a relief. Who does?
Matty: They don't tell us.
Me: Okay. Who was absent today?
Matty: B and P. They sit on either side of me.
Me: Repeat blood-curdling scream of despair.
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