New Digs

A couple of weeks ago, I received notification of the approval of my trademark for Suburban Diva; ownership papers, if you will. Yes, I own her.

This got me to thinking of the difference between she and I; me and that which I created many years ago. The column on Backwash and the book are all her. Her outrageousness, her outspokenness, her fearlessness.

But perhaps this blog, is not hers. Perhaps this is the place for Tracey; the imperfect, the flawed, the Lois Lane in the Hall of Justice.

So with that outlook, and an extreme blog makeover, I begin anew on this eve of April.

See you soon.

Short Hiatus

Just need a little time to gather my wits about me, so I am relieving myself of all blogging duties for a little while while I do that.

All is well, I assure you--we are back on track after a little slip, I just can't help but breathe misery and depression into this little outlet, and that just shouldn't be.

So, I'll check back with you soon--have some fun, will ya?

It's 80 degrees and I cannot get warm.

Oh, Amy...

Yeah, Yeah, I know

I know, you can't post something like that and then go away for a week without an update.

I can.

I can because I just don't feel ready to talk about it yet. Tomorrow morning we are back at the hospital for another test, today I await a return call from 2 different doctors, and I still can't shake that moment of the therapist signing to her out of my head. At that precise moment, the problem which I knew existed for quite some time deteriorated from, Amy doesn't talk, to Amy doesn't hear. I've been wistful for a year that she's never said, "Mommy," or "I love you," but that was the moment when it occurred to my idiot self that she hasn't heard me say it.

And I cry again.

But that won't do either of us any good, so I'll tell you of my newest habit.

I've been taking long evening walks for months now after the kids are in bed when Sean's schedule allows. It seems that clearing out my head late at night and a little exercise is rather helpful to my inner being. Sometimes I would write stories in my head. Or I would work out a problem or think. Or even cry in the dark.

Well, lately, I've picked up the pace--literally--and started running. It's a whole different feeling. You can't think about anything but your lungs burning and your heart seizing. For the first time I have some blessed nothingness where I can really turn off my brain function for a minute.

I think this is good, actually.

But it's Tuesday, and I am ready for an evening sabbatical. A little strength for tomorrow, my pretties.

Heart break

Baby Diva failed her second hearing test today.

Not a surprise--I was expecting it. We were sitting in the examination room, and there were two therapists administering the test. They evaluated the way she responded to different sounds.

They were kind and able women, you knew that they had obviously worked extensively with hearing impaired children. At one point during the test, Amy was sitting in my lap with earpieces in, and the lady was speaking to her, and out of habit, she signed to Amy as she spoke.

My heart broke into a million pieces then.

How does it feel?

It's such a roller coaster ride. You're either exhilarated at the top or crashing terrified to the bottom only to climb up again after you've thrown up.

We are nothing if not true Floridians

Taken a week apart:

In our element.





Out of it.

My Newest Idiotic Pleasure

Cheap Seats, on ESPN.

OMG.

Too freaking funny.

My book was on the Today Show!

Okay, maybe not in the comfy confines of the NBC studios being hailed by Katie, Matt or Al, but my very dear friend did manage to get not only the cover shown on the outside crowd shot, but delivered to Ms. Couric herself as she stood outside.

It's these messages in the bottles that you throw out there with the small hope that they will wash ashore somewhere...

And in other news...

The party on Friday night was a smashing success, and I am truly humbled by the turnout and support of some truly wonderful friends. This has been an amazing ride, one that I will cherish forever no matter what happens from here.

A Literary Review

This is the text message I received on my phone this morning from my darling nephew, D:

Done with the book, it was really good. I didn't realize you drink so much.

A little subtext I wish he didn't pick up on.

How cool--or how hot--is this?

Well, I've secured my first book signing.

I have to chuckle because it is not the obvious and convenient local Barnes and Noble nor the Tampa Borders; but rather it is a small independent bookstore in the Keys--as quirky as SD herself.

So, April 20-21, if all goes according to plan, I will be somewhere in the Keys not caring whether or not I sign a single copy since, well, I'll be in the Keys.

Cover to Cover Books
Tavernier Towne Shopping Center
MM 91.2, BS, 91272 Overseas Hwy., Tavernier, FL 33070